Friday, 11 November 2011

And So It Begins..

Or put another way.. 'Start as you mean to go on' :)

(I should first of all advise you dear reader that I have Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus, net result total inability to walk, plus a couple of free gifts that were on offer when I was born.)

Well.. I was two years old, and in a neighbour's garden playing on the lawn with a group of other children about the same age.  An impromptu Mothers' Group.  Anyway, throughout the afternoon little immobile me is playing with a selection of toys and finding that each one I chose the same little... *thinks* .. boy kept taking off me.  Eventually Mum saw me picking up a little toy cricket bat.

Now at this point I must digress and point out for any younger readers, I am not referring to the modern hollow plastic 'bat shaped toy'.  No, I am referring, essentially to a scaled down real cricket bat, with wooden blade, handle and everything.  Something with a little bit of weight to it, as we shall see.

Mum's last view of me, as she turned away, was of me crawling toward my tormentor with, what she failed to identify as, a determined annoyed expression on my little face.  It appears she was not yet familiar with the temper concealed within the little frame of her youngest, something she was soon to learn.  She says her innocent mind thought 'Oh, he's going to ask him to play a little game of cricket..' and turned away.

Her next recollection is of a swishing noise, such as you might get for example from a cricket bat blade cutting through the air.  This noise terminated - in every sense of the word - in a dull thud of wood meets skull.  There followed a brief silence before the air was rent with an ear-splitting screech of pain.  She turned back to see the victim bawling his eyes out, and her youngest with a big cheesy 'That'll learn him!' look on his chubby chops.  It was at this point she came to the uncomfortable realisation she was sat next to the victim's mother.  However, her worry was dispelled by said mother's comment to her child 'You deserved that.. you've been taking Julian's toys all afternoon!'

Here endeth the lesson.  And if you're wondering.. no.. he never took any more toys away from me ever again *grin*

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